What can be terrifying more than going on a first date when you were a teen? Maybe going on that very first date after your divorce.
This can cause people a lot of anxiety, but we’ve got some advice that can help you make sure the date goes off without a hitch.
1. Make sure you look great. When you’re married, you’ve probably fallen into the routine of pulling anything out of the closet that was clean and looked like it was in good condition. You don’t really feel like you have to impress your spouse so you didn’t put much effort into what you looked like. However, when you start dating again, you want to look like a single person who is looking for love, not that married person who reached for anything in the closet.
2. Allow yourself time to recover. You might want to wait a while to let the ink dry on the divorce papers before you start dating again. While there is no universal time frame for how long you should wait after a divorce to date again, it is a good idea to wait for a little. You want to reconnect with who you are as a person, but also make sure that you work out any anger or resentment you may be feeling as a result of the divorce.
3. Don’t focus on age. You might think that you want to date a particular age group because they are more fun and exciting, but you shouldn’t be so quick to judge. In fact, there are many people who are pleasantly surprised by how vivacious dating an older person can be. They’ve seen more of what life has to offer and they may even be able to teach you a thing or two in the sack.
4. Don’t fake your interests. You may have met someone that you are really attracted to but their interests don’t really appeal to you. Instead of pretending that you’re all about race cars, be honest. You don’t want to go on a date and have a conversation regarding which racer is your favorite and you sit there completely clueless. It’ll be obvious that you lied and that is a huge turn-off for most people.
5. Don’t go somewhere you and your ex-used to frequent. Sure, that restaurant on the rooftop may be perfect for a romantic evening, but you don’t want to take your date there. Why? Well, if you were a frequent customer there, the staff may embarrass you by asking where your ex-was, or worse still, you may run into your ex. It’s just an awkward situation for all involved and it can be completely avoided by simply not going there. Plus, it’s nice to find a new spot with someone—it makes it that much more special.
Dating after a divorce doesn’t have to be scary. You can turn those jitters into positive feelings by keeping in mind that this is the beginning of the rest of your life, so why not embrace the moment and enjoy it with someone new.