Going out there and looking for love after you hit 50 can be difficult. The dating world has changed significantly from when you were younger, but your expectations have followed suit, and it is because of this that many people question if dating is even an option.
Do You Hold On to that Memory of Your First Love?
There is something about a first love that we cannot forget, no matter how badly it may have ended. We often believe that we’ve found the one, our perfect match, our soulmate. We are so enamored with this person, we can’t picture our lives without them and everything just feels so perfect and wonderful.
Since this is our first experience with how amazing it feels to be in love, we often expect that every “love” we have afterward will be that powerful. Unfortunately, it almost never works out that way.
Has Your Ideas of Love Changed Throughout the Years?
If you were to ask your friends how their teenaged selves would describe what it felt like to be in love, and then asked them how they would describe it today, you may be surprised that their answers are quite similar. Many of us still expect to feel that “spark” when they go out on a date. Women want to be pursued by men and they want to be courted. A lot of us continue to search for that life partner to share the rest of our lives with.
Although there isn’t anything wrong with having high expectations of what you want in a partner, there are many people who feel like at this point in their lives, they would rather remain single than to settle for someone who isn’t “perfect.” While this is a personal decision, we can’t help but wonder if people were to broaden their expectations a bit and be more open, if they could find happiness with someone who may not fit that perfect mold.
When we are younger and still trying to figure ourselves out, we spend a lot of that time trying to decide what is important to us when we are looking for a partner. Many of us probably have spent many lunch hours talking with our friends, chattering on about what we want in a mate. Perhaps now is the perfect time to do this activity again with your other single friends. When you do, you’ll probably discover that many of your wants and needs have changed over the years!
Are Older Singles Focusing on the Wrong Qualities?
The previous activity isn’t intended for just women to try, we encourage men to try it as well. Perhaps when you compare the two lists and you see that your priorities have changed, you might be a little surprised. Men may not be so quick to turn down a woman because her skin isn’t firm and she may not have that swimmers body that he longs for, but instead she is kind, considerate, passionate, and most importantly, self-confident. Women may discover that she doesn’t need a man who has fat pockets, drives a fancy car, and has a chiseled chin, but instead he is tender, affectionate, compassionate, and knows how to treat her like she is the only woman in the world.